Truth About Trouble With Communication ~ #1 reason why is trust.

We all need to feel we are a part of and valued by that whole. Whether it is within a twosome or part of a group. We can meet these feelings of need through communication, especially speech.
Our spoken words, together with body language, generates the energy exchange that satisfies this need.
When you have trouble participating in a conversation, it reflects a lack of trust in oneself. This lack of trust originates from being too focused on not saying the wrong thing. Thinking you will upset someone if you do.
Although your intent is admirable, you perform a disservice to yourself and others when you do not trust yourself to speak. Unfortunately our bodies give us away with their non-verbal communication. This provides feedback to our audience and they can sense when thoughts, words and actions don’t flow and they will feel they cannot trust you.
For an interesting read see Wikipedia on non-verbal communication
In expecting others to be uspset by what you propose to say is almost egotistical. It is good to be mindful of your spoken words but planning your communication is inauthentic. Have faith in yourself and trust yours and others authenticity for meaningful interactions. No good can come from being inauthentic, no matter the good intentions that spearhead it.
The other side of the coin is, in your efforts to not say anything could be taken the wrong way, so you say nothing. All conversations are consultation based. It is through the spoken word and their exchange of energies that forges a deeper connection.
To form a deeper connection, communication between all participants has to be authentic. This deeper connection is then felt and enjoyed during this and future consultations. A successful consultation is when everyone has a voice and everyone takes their turn. The majority decision is final and accepted by all. This is true consultation.
A few elements to remember:
  1. You are here today in this gathering for a reason. You have a voice and your voice matters when authentic in thought and expression
  2. Forget not saying anything and leaving it all to others, this hurts everyone. You and others may never know what you could have brought to the table unless you are a part of it.
  3. Allow others to have their free flow of expression. Yes, they may stumble sometimes or go off track, but sometimes the detours tell us more!
Trust in yourself and your authenticity and that others feel the same way about you. Expect favourable outcomes in your communications, you know you are a good person. Have faith and focus on what you can bring to the table. Everyone may not be on the same page all the time but different viewpoints can bring clarity.
Think of our communication as mini soul journeys (a journey within a journey). And so it is with the all who come together with the same goal.
“There are many paths to the top of the mountain, all ending up at the same place. The view is the same and blesses all.”

Su & Soul Seekers

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  1. Alexandra on February 9, 2020 at 10:58

    This was very well written. However, to play devils advocate a bit, I know from personal experiences it’s sometimes best to stay quiet in that moment. Speaking from a heated point of view usually doesnt ever do anyone any good no matter how authentic it may be. So when it comes to situations like those that I feel as though it’s best to stay quiet & gather your thoughts. But that’s my personal opinion.

    • Su on February 11, 2020 at 08:08

      Thank You Alexandra. It’s too easy to create a perfect scenario when writing about a topic and then the real world steps in. The bottom line is to learn to trust yourself by asking the? “Is what I am about to say going to help or hinder the current situation?” Remembering if it is that important, you can always revisit later in a more receptive environment.

  2. Authentic Islet on February 10, 2020 at 10:50

    I do think it is important to be authentic and this something I consider my little practice, getting more and more authentic. It’s quite hard at times because sometimes I’m not even honest with myself and not realizing it. And I do stay quiet too often.

    • Su on February 11, 2020 at 08:11

      Thanks for commenting. The first step is to get honest and nonjudgemental of yourself. This is where your strength lies in your communication with self and then others. You will know when to speak, wait or stay quiet. Namaste.

  3. Vasundhra on February 11, 2020 at 07:27

    A journey within a journey – YES! So beautiful articulated! I love how short and crisp your words of wisdom are. This was a great reminder to be more open and receptive to healthy dialogue 🙂

    • Su on February 11, 2020 at 08:14

      Thank You, Fluff is nice for stories, but for wisdom, remembering is the key.

  4. Kevin Thompson on February 11, 2020 at 07:44

    Often, it is not that I am hesitant to say a thing, but that I am hesitant to say a thing from my true nature or self. The title of the article says it all, that it is about trust, but then goes on to say that it is more about trusting oneself, rather than my initial suspicion that it might be about trusting those we are speaking with.

    Off topic a bit, I really like this page. I commit to digging around and through it this week when I make time for learning more. It is interesting to me… the fact that you seem concerned with “spiritual soul and logical mind”.

    Last night in meditation, I found that I have had so little opportunity to say “Namaste” to others, as of late. It is encouraging to see it on your website. And to you, with every meaning of the word, I say, also, “Namaste”.

    Great job on the article. It made me think… there’s that logical mind thing.

    • Su on February 11, 2020 at 08:15

      Thank you Kevin. Mission Accomplished. Namaste!!!

  5. Clayton Micallef on February 13, 2020 at 12:54

    I see your point about authenticity. But sometimes I find that authenticity can fire back. I have experienced this a couple of times were genuinely without meaning any harm in good faith I say something to someone and they are taken aback. 2 people come to mind that even stopped talking to me. We have to be authentic in our communication but I find that there are times when it’s best to say nothing.

  6. Weaving Life's Web on February 17, 2020 at 05:57

    Communication is a super important topic, that I think we should all be trained about it way more than we are. And I agree with you – trust is often an issue when someone does not speak up. Sometimes trust in oneself, some other times trust in other people – because there is not an atmosphere that invites everyone to participate.
    an important part of speaking up – or expecting everyone to speak up – is also for me the quality of the communication. Communicating in a destructive way can sometimes do more harm than good…
    Thank you for sharing those insights, super happy to stumble upon this post, as it made me think more in-depth about the communication.

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